A few weeks ago, I participated in a meeting with a guest speaker who stated that he didn't feel women should be in positions of leadership in the church. At the same time, he was quick to acknowledge that this was his personal conviction and that there are indeed many women who have been given leadership roles in various contexts. He didn't believe this was right, based on his reading of the Bible.
I immediately had a flashback to one of my first teaching jobs, where the administrator who signed my contract also questioned the decision of those who had chosen to hire me -- not on the grounds of my CV, but because I was a woman, and a minority at that. Fortunately, I got the job.
In both cases, I started to feel a defensive wall of anger build up around me, as these kinds of statements threaten my identity deeply. At the same time, I've worked most of my life in a traditionally male-dominant field and have fortunately had some great mentors, most of them male. Some of my most memorable conversations have transpired over afternoon tea or a leisurely lunch. I count myself very blessed in this regard.
When I sat down and pondered over my own feelings more deeply, I started to realize that somehow, somewhere, our society has managed to ingrain in us the misconception that those who hold a different worldview, perspective, lifestyle choice or opinion from our own, are automatically labelled as inherently bad. This is simply not true, and furthermore, taking immediate offense, as I did, inhibits any productive discussion or even meaningful relationships we could potentially build. God has given us both free will and the ability to reason and think for ourselves, and although we often argue that we (and usually those closest to us) are right and everyone else uneducated or misinformed, if we really stop to examine this paradox, we should come to the ultimate conclusion that it's not possible for all the inhabitants of the earth to agree on any one subject.
Do I believe that women should be given equal opportunities, both in the church and in working life -- absolutely! However, I can also respect others who see things differently from me, and that it is really important that I leave them room to voice these opinions, even though they might threaten my own choices directly or indirectly. At the moment, corona restrictions have severely limited our social circles and chances are, we are only spending regular time (online or in person) with those who share similar views to our own and this is potentially more dangerous than covid itself. As a society, we will probably see the consequences for decades to come, unless we start to make a conscious choice to give space for others with differing opinions, without becoming immediately offended.
